I think pretty much everyone intuitively gets the idea that only a small percentage of your contacts are ready to become clients at any point in time.

And that you need to nurture your relationship with them so that when they are ready, you're their first choice.

However, what most people do to nurture relationships usually falls into one of two camps: neither of which is effective.

First, there's the show-off.

The show-off is all me, me, me.

They'll send you links to case studies of their clients. They'll tell you about the awards they've won or the amazing results they've got.

What they won't do is send you anything you might actually find useful. 

As a result, most clients try to avoid them. They don't return their calls or even open their emails.

The second camp is the “helpful” type.

This person is all “you, you, you”. They really do nurture their relationships by trying to be helpful to their potential clients. Sending them useful articles, introducing them to valuable resources. 

This is a good thing. It means their potential clients appreciate them. It means they'll answer their calls and open their emails.

But it's not enough.

Put it this way: no matter how many articles you send me from the Journal of Neurology, Neurosurgery and Psychiatry, there's no way I'm going to let you do brain surgery on me until I see some evidence that you're an expert. Not just a helpful person.

To win clients successfully you have to solve the dilemma of being able to get across your capabilities, expertise and results – without it just coming across as showing off.

Because if it does, no one will listen.

Yet you can't just be helpful. Because, although people will like you, they won't buy from you.

You have to artfully combine both approaches.

Lead with value. Be helpful. But do it strategically. Help in ways that demonstrate your expertise. That allow you to show the results you get.

Don’t just send people useful articles. Send your articles  that show you're an expert.

Don't just send a list of 5 ways of getting their team to work better. Show them how one of your clients implemented those 5 ways and the results they got. 

Same learning and value for the client. But now it's raising their perception of you as an expert and someone who gets results.

Without showing off.